Here are some pics of what I put up....
Allow me to explain some of them...
Sky Diving-- I WILL go Sky Diving this summer. Last summer, I attempted to go, but was crushed, devastated, and mortified when I was told that I was 5lbs over the weight limit. FIVE pounds. I went to the Greensburg, IN park with a bunch of my WLS friends for our annual WLS picnic. There were three of us who were gonna jump. My support group leader Deb, an amazing and inspiring friend, Jeff, and myself. We went thru the training, signed the paperwork and were almost ready to go. On one of the forms we had to put our weight. I was 240lbs at the time. The girl looked up at me in a room full of people and said "Are you Autumn? Do you really weigh 240?" I said, yes. She said "The weight limit is 235 so you cant jump." She walked me to their scale (one of those old styles from the doctors offices) and it weighed me at 242, with clothes on. Complete devastation set in. I was like are you for real. It was a huge slap in the face. After all the work I had done, 5lbs was stopping me from doing something I have always wanted to do. In that moment I felt defeated and I felt like my weight would always beat me. I could not stop crying for the rest of the day. However, I had to support Deb and Jeff so I put on a smile through the tears and I vowed that I would go back by the end of the summer. Watching Deb and Jeff go up in the plane and then appear in the air floating until they landed was bittersweet. I was so happy for them, yet so sad at the same time. For the next 6 weeks I worked my ass off. EVERYDAY, I worked out TWICE a day, once each day was with my trainer and I was SO good with food choices. My goal was to lose ten pounds, which would've put me at 230. I wanted to be well under 235 so there wouldnt be any problems when I went back. It didnt happen. At the end of those 6 grueling weeks, I had only lost 5lbs, which put me right at 235lbs. I didnt want to get my hopes up again, drive the hour drive, drag my support people all the way out there only to be told I was too fat to jump, again. So, I vowed to make this summer the year I go...and if it is the last thing I ever do, I WILL GO SKYDIVING THIS SUMMER.
Kings Island/Cedar Point--I havent been to a theme park since high school....ten years ago. After prom, my date, who was one of my really good friends, his sister and her bf all went to Cedar Point. The day was fun until we went to ride the Millennium Force Roller Coaster. We waited in line for the hour or so and finally it was our turn. We got on the ride and I couldnt get the buckle to fit. There were like 2 or 3 ride operators trying to help me, (by that I mean trying to force the damn thing to buckle), but it wasnt happening. I remember asking them if they had an extender and they looked at me like I was nuts. I even asked if I could just ride anyway...that definitely wasnt gonna work. End result: I had to get out of the seat, climb over my friend and walk out of the ride station in front of hundreds of people, after I had held everything up for about 5 minutes, which seemed like eternity. It was humiliating. After that, I shut down and have not been back to a theme park since. I am still extremely fearful of going...I'm still scared I wont fit, but I know I need to go and I know I deserve to let lose and have fun.
Fat No More "FNM"-inspired by the book I just got done reading. I vow to be Fat No More. I will not live life as a fat person anymore. I will take care of myself, be healthy, live life, and have fun!
One choice, one bite, one day at a time---This is something I've been saying to myself for a while. It's self-explanatory and to me, represents my journey.
I'm thinking of making more signs with inspirational quotes, reminders to take my vitamins and calcium (Did you get your vitamins in today? How about Calcium?), protein, (Have you had enough protein today?), water,( What's your H20 intake today?), etc.
I already feel a difference seeing them up. I think it's gonna help keep me motivated!!!
So, go ahead....make signs. Any signs you want. Whatever you want them to say....and put them where ever your heart desires!!!
Till next time...
Lots of Love,